there.

“Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those, who do not write, compose, or paint can manage to escape the madness, the melancholia, the panic fear, which is inherent in a human condition.”

—	Graham Greene

it's a long way from here to there

and we couldn't even meet halfway. Everytime I reach out for it, i lose touch of reality and enter what seems to be an illusion created by my wishes. And when you enter that land, the only way to exit is to fall...hard and every hope is dashed. What's left behind is a mere shell of what you once were...that soul you had may never be recovered, but if you ever do...it will be an arduous process full of disillusionments.
i feel so miserable.
i don't want this but i can't help myself, because deep down, it's my secret fantasy that we'll be back again,..together, That maybe, there's still this one last chance of redemption.
Or maybe not.
So i'll have to stop dreaming and focus on reality.