The heroine takes comfort in forgetting

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!

The world forgetting, by the world forgot.

Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!

Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd

B.U.M.

I am currently living the bum life.

• B – Boring
• U – Uh-oh
• M – Maddening

Bum. But there’s always a silver lining for every dark cloud which hovers, Eeyore-like, over my head. 

   11  Realizations

1.  I have had two boyfriends but I have never been on an official date. (The date that involves dining out, talking, and getting to know each other) Not a single date.
2.   I used to think that I could live under a rock forever. Living the Patrick Star life of sleep, eat, tv/internet, eat and sleep. Now I don’t. Life is for living and staying inside my room for a million years does not seem like a good prospect now.
3.   I am desperate for a job. I want to try out writing. I never realized how serious i was about writing as a career until I started applying for writing jobs and getting rejected in every single one.
4.   I need books. Books are my companions. I need them as much as I need air, water and food. It is vital that I read or else I’ll go stupid.
5.   I became stupid. Wow, I miss lectures. So much that I started listening to online lectures about English, Literature, Art and philosophy. If I ever get the chance to study again, I’d definitely take them up.
6. §  Writing is difficult. When I was younger, I have this idea of myself as a Superman-Writer. I could write anything and everything. Just give me pen and paper and I‘d write. Now that I’m older I realize that I am a Clark Kent too. By day I am ordinary and when the world is getting desperate, Superman comes out.
7.   Money matters. In life it does. It helps keep the world going. Yes it does not make the world go round by itself but it is one important factor. Gone are the days when bargaining things for skills could keep you alive. Now you need money.
8.   Never count your chicks before they are hatched. ‘Tis true what the famous line says; if you forget a life lesson it will keep coming back until you’ve put it to heart. I am cocky because I can write and speak better than most people. It is a heady talent to be able to do that among my peers, of course reality comes to give you a much needed bitch slap; there will always be someone lesser and better than  you so away with the cockiness.
9.   Hate is vitriol. You can love a person but that does not mean you have to like her. I am irritated by stupidity. I fear stupidity because it is crippling. Stupidity will make me a lesser person, stupidity will not make me appreciate great novels, stupidity will hinder my learning and stupidity will cripple my writing. Stupidity is a choice. Never choose stupidity.
10.   Failure is inevitable. Especially after College. I have tried thrice and have failed thrice. Third time was never the charm. I have doubted myself and I have consoled myself.
11. Keep going. I tell myself to do just that. My wallpaper says, “What’s holding you back?” My fears, self doubts, insecurities. Now that the question has been answered, i now pose a challenge to myself; Everyone deserves a chance to fly. So I will.

Hello Giggles!

Most magazines cater to the superficial demands of a woman; vanity. Somehow they never get to the real issue; personality. I have been following Hello Giggles! for quite a while but I only got to read their articles now and what I’ve read have been really good. Sometimes their articles are short but poignant, they tackle the simplest things about being a girl and it makes the reader feel a companionship with the writers. The writers are mostly actors, musicians and performers. They write really well and it’s like having an online magazine for a best friend. BFF’s talk about anything and everything and it’s what this website is all about. In their ‘About Us’ section, they mentioned the words lady friendly and standard boys club, the latter which they find unappealing, most magazines nowadays seem to be all about finding and keeping the right guy and hooking up or sex which for me is very shallow and it endorses women as boy crazy. Imagine how boys would think when reading magazines that only talk about those issues, is that what really goes on in girls brains? Fashion and beauty magazines are fine but they tend to make the readers insecure and insecurity is a girl’s worst vice and magazines like that tend to foster the idea that we have to aspire to the model’s looks to be truly beautiful. It’s all so phony. Hello Giggles is a fresh relief, reading them makes you feel good about yourself.


Update: I do not find this site as interesting as when it started out. Now it just has photos of nails and stuff....dull.

Drowning my sorrows in loud music.

Jon Snow

I refuse to make a mediocre article for my first assignment. I refuse to make mediocre stuff. This is a rant. My birthday sucked. I never felt it as a happy occasion, I'm blaming it on Jon Snow and GRRM. Ah,damn you GRRM for what you did. I am thoroughly unsettled by the whole affair and I don't think I can see any silver lining to what happened. I am now an Eeyore. A dark cloud hovers above my head and spurts occasional rain showers. I am also jobless, unemployed, stuck in a rut; classic signs of a failure. And then the Breaker of Promises or the One with Words that don't Count made me hope again, and subsequently crushed my hopes. There is nothing there. NOTHING. I berate myself but i often find that I'm too lazy to nag or self flagellate. Perhaps because I am waiting for the calls-that-never-came. They said a week, it's almost Thursday and still nothing. Rejection is terrible, this one will hurt even more because I initiated it. I actually had the courage to send go by myself. Of course it was all in vain. I should really get used to this by now. This post is called Jon Snow because...argh.

Do not stand at my grave and weep

I am not there. I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.

I am the diamond glints on snow.

I am the sunlight on ripened grain.

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush

I am the swift uplifting rush.

Of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not stand at my grave and cry;

I am not there. I did not die.

--------Mary Elizabeth Frye

My life held together by scotch tape

Scotch Tape is a very important tool in keeping things together. My phone broke and only scotch tape holds it together. The frame in my glasses fell apart and now I feel like Harry Potter whose glasses were held together by scotch tape, plus it's lopsided. I had a great weekend at the beach. Only Monday came and sucked it all out. There's something horrible about Mondays. Perhaps it's the fact that after having enjoyed a weekend of bliss, more than half the world's population would now have to get back to their respective and boring jobs. or maybe students going back to the sludge of school. My Monday was made terrible because of unwelcome talks regarding my future. I seriously cannot abide stupid people. Gah. What a bad start to the week! Oh and its Yoann's birthday. Happy birthday to my first football crush.
BTW, I am now a Formula 1 fan. A newbie but I'm already rooting for RBR-Renault.