it's a long way from here to there

and we couldn't even meet halfway. Everytime I reach out for it, i lose touch of reality and enter what seems to be an illusion created by my wishes. And when you enter that land, the only way to exit is to fall...hard and every hope is dashed. What's left behind is a mere shell of what you once were...that soul you had may never be recovered, but if you ever do...it will be an arduous process full of disillusionments.
i feel so miserable.
i don't want this but i can't help myself, because deep down, it's my secret fantasy that we'll be back again,..together, That maybe, there's still this one last chance of redemption.
Or maybe not.
So i'll have to stop dreaming and focus on reality.

so messed up

I'm a self-assured woman of substance. A dedicated singleton who will not let the past bite me in the butt.Again.and again.and again. So, after this tiny moment which will probably be imprinted forever in my life, i will not , ever, log-in and wait with stars in my eyes, for nothing!
My hands are shaking badly and i'm feeling cold all over. After all this time, it still has this damning effect on me. But then again, this stuff will be gone in a few seconds...waiting, waiting...waiting...i'm ready for it to go away...waiting...
huh.
still here.
Ugh
And here I am, trying to make up for being such a bad, bad girl, by making stuff seem interesting. Wanting to know how long patience could stretch...or maybe just how long i'll last before i burst and spill my guts out.
i'd probably lose again.
again.

the creativity problems of today's youth (esp.me)

While surfing in the waters of the vast network of the www, i stumbled upon this blog posting an article about a storywriting competition. I wanted in. So badly that i took the canvas we were supposed to write about and placed it as the wallpaper of my pc. Unfortunately, the muses are evading me. I'm badly in need of an inspiration. I've already decided to use Filipino as my language in writing so as to give more feeling to the story. In my opinion (and no, i do not care if you object to this) talking about the Philippine culture in english does not truly capture it's essence. There are words that only the Filipino language can truly put into life!

some.like.it.hot

We like it hotter. Unfortunately, not even the fiery fury of the fires attempted by the speakers could fuel our ears to perk up and listen. The state of chaos at the back portion of the room was inevitable since it wasn't really our choice to be there. As always, we had an alternative for boredom, cam-whoring!